<div><img id="title" src="img2/title.png"></div>
<<if $start>>[[Continue->Start]]<<else>>[[Start]]<</if>>
[[Settings]]
[[Extras]]
[[Credits]]<img id="graphics" src="images/distant.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>:
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>:
</div>
Ha-ha!
Mmhm.
How dare you!
I shall have your head!
Oh my!
Yes!
No good. :(
You'll love this one!
Excellent!
<img id="graphics" src="images/distant.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phantom Knight</span>:
</div>
Hello!
I'm sorry...
Wonderful!
(sad noises, sad exhale)
Goodness!
(crying noises)
You're mean!
<img id="graphics" src="images/distant.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>:
</div>
Ugh.
Whatever.
Uh, yeah!
So annoying!
(bummed out noises, frustrated exhale)
Oh.
Thanks, i guess.
(super angry noise/shriek)
That's better.
<img id="graphics" src="images/distant.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>:
</div>
Hello!
(tired sad exhale)
(disappointed bummed out "oh")
Mmhm!
It's a long story
Hello again!
You'll pay for this.
How could you?
What? (hurt)
You are wonderful!
<img id="graphics" src="images/distant.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>:
</div>
@@padding-right:0px;<div class="checkbox">\
<<checkbox "$mute2" false true `$mute2 ? 'checked' : ''`>>\
<label for="checkbox-mute2"> @@font-size: 20px;SFX@@</label>\
</div>@@
\<<nobr>>
<<if $cute1 && $cute2 && $cute3 && $cute4 && $cute5>>
<<goto "good end">>
<<elseif $story1 && $story2 && $story3 && $story4 && $story5>>
<<goto "good end">>
<<elseif $angry1 && $angry2 && $angry3 && $angry4 && $angry5>>
<<goto "good end">>
<</if>>
<</nobr>>
Bad ending:
-therapist is lookin at papers or whatever, by herself w dark bg
-fort: now wait just a minute! (th looks up, cut to fort) u think u can escape that easily that after treating us like that?
-est: we are villains after all, muchacha, or did you forget that when you were playing the bully?
-phil: you really hurt my feelings, and i will never forgive you for that! i will make sure you taste the same pain i suffered!!
-boneson: ur foul actions shall cause for trouble!
-boneston: and make that double!
-fort: you picked on the wrong house, fool! (pause, looks at her side where spudz is)
-(cut to angry spudz for a sec, zoom in on his even angrier face for his line) oh its ON, bitch.
13-14 frames
Good ending:
same intro
-phil: um, ms therapist, before u leave, we villains would like to thank u again for helping us.
-esteban: as villains, we do not get help from others, as they all are afraid of us.
-boneson: but you, on the other hand, have treated us with the utmost kindness.
-bonetson: a type of kindness we have never received before.
-phil: u, u were like a friend to all of us, despite our evil backgrounds.
-fort: I guess we can be, like, friends or whatever, if you want.
-spudz: we will be best friends!
(they all hug, maybe w som cute happy noises. th looks irritated at first, sighs, then smiles softly.)
14-15 frames
-first passage introduction, u choose 3 musics with vinyl noise over em (u have a vinyl record)
-boneson and bonetson
the t is silent
sons of the duke of hell
dont want to be villains, its too boring and repetitive
want to be comedians instead
-phantom knight
name is actually phil philson, doesn't use it cuz its not spooky enough
lives in a dungeon, threatens and fights heros for living (mini-boss)
being evil and spooky makes everyone run away, he feels lonely
wants to stop being a villain so he could have friends
started a knitting club but nobody joined
-fortissimi
demon/hell queen
kicked a dude in the dick. twice
has stupid subjects who rely on their gorgeous, smexy queene too much
"your majesty, please stir my soup!" "your majesty, i cant find my socks!" "your majesty, i killed someone and need help hiding the body!"
tired of being an evil demon queen, wants to take a long, hard-earned vacation or just stop being a villain all together
has a bearded dragon (the lizard not an actuall dragon, all her other dragons flew away to conquer their own terriotories bcuz her evil infected them) named Deathslayer X
-esteban mierda gilipollas cabron
undead luchador
rose from the grave cuz if he died no one would be there to take care of his dog honey
considered a villain cuz hes a cliptomaniac, stolen 19.4 billions of $ and counting, has even stolen from US former president michael bay
it socks cuz should he really be considered a villain for having a problem/addiction?
reputation bad from stealing, cant find work as a luchador cuz to his ppl luchadors are like vaqueros, they fight for honor!!! and he cant fight for honor!! if hes a thcief
ppl in his small town voted to get him evicted (him getting a bf was their last straw), got kicked out of his own house b4 he could even pack or get his dog honey, so he hasnt seen her in 120-something years (its ok she's immortal)
-spudz!!
doesnt regret being a villain, only here cuz his mom made him
fav hobbies include tearing the limbs of his enemies and catching frisbees
will tell u abt the time where pee wee told him he was stupid, so the next day he took out pee wee's eye and chewed it right in front of him, he found it funny how the cat screamed and cried
<<elseif $story1 && $story2 && $story3 && $story4 && $story5>>
<<goto "good end">><img id="graphics2" src="images/angery-gorl.png" height="490px">
<div id="txt">Hi! This is you, an exhausted therapist who does not get paid enough for this <<if $mode>>crap<<else>>shit<</if>>. Today is just a regular day dealing with sad villains. Five of them are sitting in your support group, each quirkier than the other. How about we put a vinyl record on to soften the mood?
<<link "Ya like jazz?" "main">><<audio "vi_jazz" volume 0.7 loop play>><<set $start to true>><</link>>
<<link "I want relaxing ukelele music" "main">><<audio "vi_uke" volume 0.7 loop play>><<set $start to true>><</link>>
<<link "80's funk is my jam" "main">><<audio "vi_retro" volume 0.7 loop play>><<set $start to true>><</link>>
<<link "No thanks" "main">><<set $start to true>><</link>>
</div>
\<<nobr>><<if $start>><<goto "main">><</if>><</nobr>>
@@padding-left:5px;<div class="checkbox">\
<<checkbox "$mute" false true `$mute ? 'checked' : ''`>>\
<label for="checkbox-mute"> @@font-size: 20px;Music@@</label>\
</div>@@
@@padding-left:35px;<div class="checkbox2" title="Family Friendly Mode">\
<<checkbox "$mode" false true `$mode ? 'checked' : ''`>>\
<label for="checkbox-mode"> @@font-size: 20px;FF Mode@@</label>\
</div>@@
[[Menu]]
<<return>>
@@font-size:18px;
VOICES
Boneson and Bonetson - Mark Lee
Phantom Knight - Mark Lee
Undead Luchador - Michael Reyes
Fortissimi - Caitlin Buckley
MUSIC
*Book Bag - E's Jammy Jams
*That Never Dies - Norma Rockwell
*<a src="http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100809" target="_blank">Mandeville</a> - <a src="http://incompetech.com/" target="_blank">Kevin MacLeod</a>
@@
@@.bitch;[[Menu]]@@<<audio ":paused" volume 0.8 loop play>>\
<img id="graphics2" src="images/angery-gorl.png" height="490px">
<div id="txt">Who do you want to talk with? <<nobr>>
<<if $cute1 && $cute2 && $cute3 && $cute4 && $cute5>>
Or do you want to [[go home->good end]]?
<<elseif $angry1 && $angry2 && $angry3 && $angry4 && $angry5>>
Or do you want to [[go home->bad end]]?
<</if>>
<<if $story1 && $story2 && $story3 && $story4 && $story5>>
<<if $angry1 || $angry2 || $angry3 || $angry4 || $angry5>>
Or do you want to [[go home->bad end]]?
<</if>><</if>>
<</nobr>>
<<timed 1s>>[[The skeleton twins]]<</timed>>
<<timed 1.5s>>[[The Phantom Knight]]<</timed>>
<<timed 2s>>[[The demon Queen]]<</timed>>
<<timed 2.5s>>[[The undead luchador]]<</timed>>
<<timed 3s>>[[Spudz the dog]]<</timed>>
</div><<if $angry2>><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/cry.png">
\<<audio "p-cry1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Please don't talk to me, I'm in the middle of silently sobbing at the moment. I hope you're happy with what you've done.
[[Whatever you say->main]]
<<set $story2 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $cute2>><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/knit.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Oh, I'm sorry, but I can't talk right now. I need to finish your sweater.
[[Take it easy->main]]
<<set $story2 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $happy2>><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/phant.png">
\<<audio "p-hello2" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Hello again! Can I help you with anything?
[[I wanna join your knitting club]]
[[Nah->main]]</div>
<<else>><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/phant.png">
<<audio "p-hello1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phantom Knight</span>: Hello! You must die.
[[Well that's not nice]]
</div><</if>><<if $angry1>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/angry.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Oh no you don't! We are strictly enemies from now on, and enemies do not chit-chat with each other!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Enemies, indeed.
[[Oh->main]]
<<set $story1 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $cute1>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/cute.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: ...so I will turn to you and say, "You cannot fool me, Bonetson, I can see right through you!" And then you reply, "Enough with the skeleton jokes, you wretched bonehead!"
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: And then I take off my arm and smack you with it!
[[I'll leave you then if you don't wanna bother to notice me->main]]
<<set $story1 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $happy1>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/reg-bone.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Why hello again, dearest therapist! How can we be of assistance?
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: To be precise, hello.
[[When are you hosting your first comedy show?]]
[[Where are your pants]]
[[Just wanna say hi->main]]
</div>
<<else>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/bones.png">
\<<audio "b-ha" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">???</span>: Greetings, human!
<span style="color: dimgray">???</span>: To be precise, greetings.
<<link "Yo">><<replace "#txt">>
\<span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: The name is Boneson.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: And I go by Bonetson, the T is silent.
[[Tell me about yourselves]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><</if>><<if $angry3>><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/bad.png"><div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Don't you show your disgusting face anywhere near me, you <<if $mode>>freaking<<else>> fucking<</if>> freak! You'll pay for being such a little <<if $mode>>buttsniffer<<else>>shit<</if>>, and mark my words!
[[Sheesh->main]]
<<set $story3 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $cute3>><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/necklace.png"><div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I don't wanna chat right now, I'm busy doing friendship stuff...for you. I-it's not like I consider you a super close friend or anything, so don't try to bond with me more!!
[[Ok->main]]
<<set $story3 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $happy3>><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fort.png"><div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: What do want from me now?
[[I want to be your friend]]
[[Why are you wearing such a casual dress when you're a Queen?->chatty]]
[[Nothing->main]]
</div>
<<else>><<audio "d-ugh3" play>><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fort.png"><div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Ugh. If I had known I had to talk to a rat like you today I would have never came here.
[[Rude!]]
</div><</if>><<if $angry4>><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/mad.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Do you not understand what I said? Do I have to use my fists to make it clear?
[[No thanks->main]]
<<set $story4 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $cute4>><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/scrap.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: I would love to talk to you right now, //muchacha//, but I'm working on an album of the cutest little dog.
[[Catch ya later alligator->main]]
<<set $story4 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $happy4>>\<<audio "e-again" play>><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/lucha.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Hello again, //mi dama amable//. Would you like anything from me? Perhaps you want to hear one of my many lucha stories?
[[I wanna see pics of your dog]]
[[No thanks->main]]
</div>
<<else>><<audio "e-hello" play>><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/lucha.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Undead Luchador</span>: Ah, hello! How are you?
[[Terrible but I'm not supposed to tell you->bios]]
[[Pretty good!->bios]]
</div><</if>><<if $angry5>><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/bad.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: ...
[[...->main]]
<<set $story5 to true>>\
</div>
<<elseif $cute5>><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<<if $done>><div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I don't feel like talking right now.
[[Oh->main]]</div>
\<<else>><div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I don't feel like talking right now, but go ahead if you must.
[[Why are everyone's hands deformed?]]
[[I don't wanna bother you->main]]</div><</if>>
<<set $story5 to true>>\
<<elseif $happy5>><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Hi! You want to talk, //buddy//?
[[How are you?]]
[[I'm good->main]]
</div>
<<else>><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: <<timed 0.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 1.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 2.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 4s>><<goto "spudzy">><</timed>>
</div><</if>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/reg-bone.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: We, child, are the sons of the Duke of Hell.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: To be precise, THE Duke of [[Hell]].</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/smart.png">
\<<audio "b-hm" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: He is quite evil, and therefore, we must follow his [[footsteps]]. We have been ordered to slash his enemies and help him spread his evilness across the land.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Quite evil, might I add.</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/however.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: HOWEVER...! We do not wish to continue this villainous career.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Absolutely not!
<<if $mode>>[[Cowards->reason]]<<else>>[[Pussies->reason]]<</if>>
[[Why not?->reason]]
</div>
<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/however.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Now, you must understand that we have a [[dream]]. A dream bigger than being a villain, in fact!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: A big dream, yes.
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/comedic.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: We want to be...<<timed 1.5s>> COMEDIANS!<</timed>>
<<timed 2.5s>><span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: To be precise, comedians.<</timed>>
<<timed 3s>>[[Neat]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/comedic.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: We want to make people laugh, to draw a sweet smile across their faces, not gash them to pieces!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Make them laugh, indeed.
[[Why don't you crack a joke for me?->joke1]]
[[Sounds boring->sad]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/comedic.png">
\<<audio "b-laugh" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: *Ahem* Why do skeletons always feel so lonely?
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Because they have no body around!!
[[Haha?]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/wait.png">
\<<audio "b-dare" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Now wait a moment! You claim to be a therapist yet you slander our sensitive, baby boy emotions!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Quite an offense, really...!
[[I'm sowwy :(->ret]]
[[Your face is an offense->hate]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/apology.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: I appreciate your clearly sincere apology, and thus you shall be forgiven for your horrid sin.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Quite a horrid sin, to be exact.
[[Now tell me your joke!->joke1]]
</div><<set $angry1 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/angry.png">
\<<audio "b-head" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Well! We shall see that as a declaration of war! I hope you prepare your armies well, child, for we will make sure none shall survive!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: To be precise, none shall survive.
[[Whatever->main]]
</div><<set $angry1 to false>>
<<set $angry2 to false>>
<<set $angry3 to false>>
<<set $angry4 to false>>
<<set $angry5 to false>>
<<set $happy1 to false>>
<<set $happy2 to false>>
<<set $happy3 to false>>
<<set $happy4 to false>>
<<set $happy5 to false>>
<<set $cute1 to false>>
<<set $cute2 to false>>
<<set $cute3 to false>>
<<set $cute4 to false>>
<<set $cute5 to false>>
<<set $story1 to false>>
<<set $story2 to false>>
<<set $story3 to false>>
<<set $story4 to false>>
<<set $story5 to false>>
<<set $start to false>>
<<set $done to false>>
<<cacheaudio "vi_jazz" "music/book-bag.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "jazz" "music/Book_Bag.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "vi_uke" "music/dies.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "uke" "music/That-Never_Dies.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "vi_retro" "music/man.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "retro" "music/Mandeville.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "sad" "music/vinyl.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-dare" "sfx/boney-bones/1/dare1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-excellent" "sfx/boney-bones/1/excellent1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-ha" "sfx/boney-bones/1/ha3.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-head" "sfx/boney-bones/1/head3.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-hm" "sfx/boney-bones/1/hm2.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-laugh" "sfx/boney-bones/1/laugh1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-love" "sfx/boney-bones/1/love1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-nogood" "sfx/boney-bones/1/nogood1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-ohmy" "sfx/boney-bones/1/ohmy1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "b-yes" "sfx/boney-bones/1/yes1.mp3">>
<<cacheaudio "p-cry1" "sfx/phil/cry1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-cry3" "sfx/phil/cry3.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-goodness" "sfx/phil/goodness1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-hello1" "sfx/phil/hello1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-hello2" "sfx/phil/hello2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-mean1" "sfx/phil/mean1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-mean2" "sfx/phil/mean2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-sigh" "sfx/phil/sigh2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-sorry" "sfx/phil/sorry1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-wonderful1" "sfx/phil/wonderful1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "p-wonderful2" "sfx/phil/wonderful2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-better1" "sfx/queene/better1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-hm1" "sfx/queene/hm1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-oh1" "sfx/queene/oh1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-oh2" "sfx/queene/oh2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-oh3" "sfx/queene/oh3.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-oh4" "sfx/queene/oh4.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-scream3" "sfx/queene/scream3.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-sigh1" "sfx/queene/sigh1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-thanks2" "sfx/queene/thanks2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-ugh1" "sfx/queene/ugh1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-ugh2" "sfx/queene/ugh2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-ugh3" "sfx/queene/ugh3.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "d-yah3" "sfx/queene/yah3.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-again" "sfx/estyy/again.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-angry" "sfx/estyy/angry.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-hello" "sfx/estyy/hello.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-how" "sfx/estyy/how.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-pay" "sfx/estyy/pay1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-sigh" "sfx/estyy/sigh.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-story1" "sfx/estyy/story1.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-story2" "sfx/estyy/story2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-what" "sfx/estyy/what.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-what2" "sfx/estyy/what2.wav">>
<<cacheaudio "e-wonderful" "sfx/estyy/wonderful.wav">>
<<createaudiogroup ":music">>
<<track "vi_jazz">>
<<track "vi_uke">>
<<track "vi_retro">>
<</createaudiogroup>>
<<set $mode to false>>
<<set $mute to false>>
<<set $mute2 to false>><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/comedic.png">
\<<audio "b-love" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Wait, wait, we have another one!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: A knee-cap smacker as the folks say!
<<link "Oh boy">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: What did I say last night before I <<if $mode>>banged<<else>>fucked<</if>> Bonetson's ex-wife, Boneseen?
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Wait, what?
<span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Bone appetit!
[[Oh wow um]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/smart.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: See? We have many humerus jokes to spare, yet our father finds us an embarrassment! He does not understand our passion, and thus we are forced to live an unhappy life as villains.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: To be precise, forced to be villains.
[[Why not fight AND joke?]]
[[Boohoo. No one cares->sad2]]
</div>
<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/win.png">
\<<audio "b-yes" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Yes, I... Yes! But of course! We shall make him understand by killing our enemies through laughter!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: They will beg us to stop!
<span style="color: black">Both</span>: We shall be... <<timed 4.5s>>[[COMEDIC villains!!]]<</timed>>
</div>
<<set $happy1 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/thank.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Truly, therapist, you have been of marvelous help. We will make sure to repay you in the near future.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: For now we can only offer our gratitude.
[[Glad I could help->main]]
</div><<set $angry1 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/angry.png">
\<<audio "b-dare" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: We pour out our emotions and troubles and you dare insult us despite it being a delicate and difficult subject for us to talk about? I have never loathed someone so much in all the 8227 years I have lived!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Prepare to face our wrath, //weakling//.
[[Too bad->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/sorry.png">
<<audio "p-sorry" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phantom Knight</span>: It isn't? Oh I'm sorry, I'm just not quite used to talking casually to people, I'm more used to hurling death threats, being a villain and all.
[[Tell me about yourself->bio2]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/phant.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phantom Knight</span>: Well, my name is Phantom Knight. I know it's not very creative, but I can't scare anyone away by screaming "I am Phil!" whenever a hero approaches my dungeon.
<<link "You live in a dungeon?">><<replace "#txt">>
\<span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Oh yes! It's part of my job requirements as a mini-boss. I try to make it cozy whenever possible. My teddy bear Mr. Fluffinsky used to help a great deal, but I haven't seen him in years. I hope he's alright.
[[Me too->cont]]
<</replace>><</link>>
[[Neat->cont]]</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/lonely.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: But you see, scaring all these humans may seem enticing at first, yet I still end up driving people away from me. I can't help but feel a little lonely.
[[Aww :(]]
<<if $mode>>[[Lmao you a dummy dumb loser->bad]]<<else>>[[Lmao you a weak ass loser->bad]]<</if>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/lonely.png">
\<<audio "p-sigh" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: I've tortured and beheaded many but I can't seem to befriend one. And I don't want to be a villain if it means I can't have [[friends]].
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/bad.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: H-hey! Loneliness is a real problem, you can't just bully someone for it. That's something a bully would do!
[[You right->sorry]]
[[I am a bully]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/lonely.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: I even started my own knitting club, called The Knittie Bitties, and I pinned flyers on every wall in my town, and still no one comes to my meetings. I have to knit all by myself, with no one but the inky darkness that is etched in my fragile heart.
[[You can knit with your villain folks here!]]
[[Knitting is for sissies you worm->bad2]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/happy.png">
\<<audio "p-wonderful1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: R-really? I can knit with villains? I didn't think of that <<link "before!">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Oh I can't wait to make evil [[buddies]] and knit sweaters with them! And I must bake cookies for our first club meeting, too!<</replace>><</link>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/bad.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: N-n-no, no it's not! Knitting is for everyone!! Only the meanest of [[meanbeans]] would make fun of it!
</div><<set $happy2 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/phil/thankful.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Thank you, Ms. Therapist, very much for your help. You are a kind soul, and I'll make sure to tell all my future friends how wonderful you are.
[[You're such a sweetheart!->main]]
[[Calm down I'm just doing it for the paycheck->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/phil/thankful.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Yes, thank you for your heartfelt apology, just make sure not to hurt anyone's feelings ever again. Now where was I...?
[[You said you have troubles making friends->Aww :(]]
</div><<set $angry2 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/phil/bad.png">
\<<audio "p-mean1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Well I for one was not planning on meeting a bully today as they make me cry. Please stay away from me now as I would like some alone time.
[[K->main]]
</div><<set $angry2 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/phil/bad.png">
\<<audio "p-mean2" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: I may be a villain, but I'm certainly not a monster like you! I don't want to speak to you ever again!
[[Boohoo->main]]
</div><<set $cute2 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/phil/gosh.png">
\<<audio "p-goodness" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Gosh golly, you do? You wanna be a member of The Knittie Bitties?
<<link "Heck yeah my dude">><<replace"#txt">>
\<span style="color: midnightblue">Phil</span>: Oh, ok! I will start knitting a sweater for you to make you an official member! I hope you like pink kitties because that's the theme that I'm going for.
[[Cool beans->main]]
[[I kinda hate pink but ok->main]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fort.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Don't take it personal, sis. I call everyone a rat.
[[Tell me about yourself]]
[[To be honest, you're a rat too]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fort.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I'm Fortissimi, demon Queen of Hell. I eat my enemies for breakfast. Conquered a few continents. Kicked a dude in the <<if $mode>>balls<<else>>dick<</if>>. Twice.
[[Sounds awesome]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/not-awesome.png">
\<<audio "d-hm1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Well it's not! Being an evil, cold-blooded Queen is so tiring! Getting a free bearded dragon as a royal bonus is pretty nice, but sometimes I wish I wasn't a Queen at all!
[[Spill the tea, sis]]
<<link "You have a bearded dragon??">><<replace "#txt">>
\<span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Of course, you shmuck, it's one of the basic requirements of being royalty! His name is Deathslayer X. He's not a //real// dragon because all my other dragons got infected with my evilness and flew away to invade other people's territories, but he's a pretty chill guy.
[[So why do you hate being a ruler?->Spill the tea, sis]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tea.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Well, it's not so much being a ruler that sucks, it's the <<if $mode>>dumb<<else>>dumbass<</if>> demon [[subjects]] I have to deal with! None of them have a single brain cell anymore! Like what the <<if $mode>>hell<<else>>fuck<</if>>!!
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tea.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Every damn day they're like, "Your Majesty, please stir my soup!" or "Your Majesty, there's a spooky human under my bed!" or "Your Majesty, I killed someone and need help burying the body!" They're SO [[demanding]] and can't even do anything on their own for just FIVE. <<if $mode>>FREAKING<<else>>FUCKING<</if>>. MINUTES.
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/wish.png">
\<<audio "d-sigh1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I just wish I could have a long vacation or just quit being a villain all together. What's the point if all I get to ever do is babysit my brainless people?
[[Hire an evil babysitter that will take care of your people!]]
[[You should quit since you suck so much at being a Queen->baddie]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/oh.png">
\<<audio "d-oh1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Oh.<<timed 1.3s>> I didn't.<</timed>><<timed 2.6s>> Think of it.<</timed>><<timed 3.8s>> That way.<</timed>>
<<timed 4.8s>>[[It's ok]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/no.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: ...<<timed 1.5s>><<goto "baddie2">><</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tsundere.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Hey! I don't need your words of comfort! I'm not a dummy or [[anything!]]
</div><<set $happy3 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tsundere.png">
\<<audio "d-thanks2" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I just didn't think things through. But thanks anyway, I guess. I was in a pickle and you helped me. Don't expect me to be nice 'cuz I'm still an evil demon.
[[All right->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/oh.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: You...<<timed 1.5s>>you want to be my friend?<</timed>><<timed 3s>> Like a real friend?<</timed>>
<<timed 4.5s>>[[Yah]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/ok.png">
\<<audio "d-oh3" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Oh. <<timed 1s>>Um. <</timed>><<timed 2s>>Ok.<</timed>><<timed 3.5s>> I will have to make a friendship necklace then. I make them with lava rocks 'cuz I like their color.<</timed>>
<<timed 4.5s>>[[What a cutie]]<</timed>>
</div><<set $cute3 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tsundere.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: H-hey! I'm a super hot supreme ruler of Hell, not a cutie! But since you're my friend you may call me Munchie Poo, but only once!!1!1 Now scram outta my face so I can make you a gorgeous necklace!
[[A'ight->main]]
</div><<set $angry3 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/queen/bad.png">
\<<audio "d-scream3" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: How //DARE// you insult me like that! Do you know how much power I have? Do you know how easy it is for me to crush your weak <<if $mode eq false>>ass motherfuckin' <</if>>skull with my bare hands? And you dare call me a //bad Queen//?
<<link "Oh my God chill">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I will personally make sure you burn to crisps from my own flames at the deepest pits of Hell, and you will scream for mercy as the pain slowly eats you away!
[[God damn sis!->main]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/lucha.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Well my name is Esteban Mierda Gilipollas Cabrón, but you can just call me Esteban. I'm an undead luchador, as you can see. I've been alive for a long time, but I've stopped counting at 340 years.
[[So you're a luchador, eh?]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/ya.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh yes, I used to be a professional wrestler not too long ago. I fought lots of big wrestlers, //muchacha//, even legends like El Santo! Of course, I never really lost any fights because I'm a zombie, but I fought valiantly and that's all that counts! //Lucha libre// is all about honor, after all!
<<link "How did you become a zombie?">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Well, somewhere in the 1600's, I died from having too much sex, but right after they buried my sexy, dead body, I was like, "Wait a minute! I can't die like that when my sweet dog Honey has no one to take care of her!" So I broke through my grave and one thing led to another!
[[Now tell me what happened to your lucha life->lucha]]
[[I bet your dummy dog stinks just like you]]<</replace>><</link>>
[[Used to? What happened to your glory?->lucha]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/thief.png">
\<<audio "e-story2" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Well the thing is, I'm considered a villain for being a master thief (it's also because I killed a lot of people and committed arson a few times but that doesn't matter right now). Ever since I was little, I've been stealing every shiny, rich-looking thing I find. I can't help it, //muchacha//! It feels so thrilling and satisfying every time I do it, especially when it's something that is difficult to steal. I don't care so much about the money, but for some reason I always lean towards shiny jewlery and fancy wallets. So far I've stolen about 9 million dollars worth of expensive items.
<<link "Jenkies, dude">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: My townspeople knew that I was a crazy thief and hated me for it. During the 20th century, just when //lucha libre// started to become popular, they all gathered and made a petition to ban me altogether. Me and my boyfriend Carlos got [[evicted]] from our own house before we could pack. I even lost my job as a luchador for being a criminal.
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/honey.png">
\<<audio "e-sigh" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: And the worst part is that I couldn't bring my sweet dog Honey with me, so now she's at our abandoned house all alone! I gave her immortality, because I won't let her die on me when I'm also immortal, so I know that she's still somewhere out there in this cruel world. I just hope she's ok.
<<link "Me too">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: And this is all because I'm a villain. I never wanted to be a villain, //muchacha//! Should I really be seen as something evil just for having an addiction?
[[I'm a therapist, I'll help you with your addiction]]
[[You ARE a villain, you deserve to be punished->meanie]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/help.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh! <<timed 1s>> Oh you are!<</timed>><<timed 2.5s>> I almost forgot!<</timed>><<timed 4s>> Will you really help me? Is there hope left for a suffering, beautiful soul such as mine?<</timed>>
<<timed 5s>>[[It will take a long while, but we will get there]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/think.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh. <<timed 1.5s>>Is that what you really think of me? <</timed>><<timed 3s>>An evil, unredeemable thief?<</timed>>
<<timed 4.5s>>[[Obviously]]<</timed>>
</div><<set $happy4 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/happ.png">
\<<audio "e-wonderful" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh! <<timed 1.5s>>Oh I'm so happy!! <</timed>><<timed 2.5s>> Someone is finally gonna lend a hand!<</timed>>
<<timed 4s>><<link "Don't mention it">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: <<timed 0.3s>>Thank you <</timed>><<timed 0.7s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 1s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 1.3s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 1.7s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 2s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 2.3s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 2.7s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 3s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 3.3s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 3.7s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 4s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 4.3s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 4.7s>>thank you <</timed>><<timed 5s>>thank you!<</timed>><<timed 5.3s>>!<</timed>><<timed 5.7s>>!<</timed>><<timed 6s>>!<</timed>><<timed 6.3s>>!<</timed>><<timed 6.7s>>!<</timed>><<timed 7s>>!<</timed>><<timed 7.3s>>!<</timed>>
<<timed 1.3s>>[[Please calm down->main]]<</timed>><</replace>><</link>><</timed>>
</div><<set $cute4 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/help.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh! <<timed 1.5s>>You want to see Honey? My sweet angel? I'm so excited!! I saved so many of her pictures in my album, you will love all of them! Let me fetch them for a second!<</timed>>
<<timed 2.5s>>[[Can't wait->main]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/think.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Is that so? Then if I tear open your flesh right now and steal your organs, will that still make me a villain? If I stab through your sockets with my fingers and steal your eyeballs, will that still make me a villain?
[[Uh...]]
</div><<set $angry4 to true>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/mad.png">
\<<audio "e-pay" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: You want me to be a villain so bad, //muchacha//? You want me to rob you of all that makes you happy? Then so be it. I will make you regret turning me into a monster.
[[Whatever you say->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Oh hi! I didn't see you there!
<<link "I'm literally right in front of you">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: My name is Spudz. I don't actually have a problem with being a villain, my mommy just made me come here. She thinks I have a problem.
[[You're a villain?]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Oh yeah! I did a bunch of mean bean stuff in the past so I guess that makes me a villain. You know, stuff like typical killing and torturing, nothing too big.
[[Who did you torture??->tort]]
<<link "Do you have any villainy hobbies Spudz?">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Oh yeah! On my freetime I like to eat ice cream, search for bones, tear off the limbs of my enemies, torture Pee Wee, and catch frisbees! But I'm a busy guy, you see, so I rarely get a chance to have that much fun everyday.
[[Elaborate on the torturing part->tort]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: My friend Pee Wee the cat sometimes gets on my nerves. Just a week ago he called me stupid when I was having a bad day, and you know what I [[did]]?
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I bit off his ear. I chewed it right in front of him. He kept screaming and crying like a little <<if $mode eq false>>bitch<</if>> baby, it was so funny that I almost choked on his ear while [[laughing!]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: But he was getting so loud that it gave me a headache, so you know what I did [[next]]?
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I bit off his tongue, so now he can't talk anymore! But it's ok, no matter what happens we're best buds forever! And we're gonna stay that way whether he likes it or not! Isn't that adorable?
[[...sure]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Anyways, since you're a therapist and all, what do you suggest I do considering that I'm perfectly happy with my current life and have no issues whatsoever?
[[Continue being a villain I guess]]
<<nobr>><<if $mode>>[[Go to church you freaking freak->bad dog]]<<else>>[[Go to church you fucking freak->bad dog]]<</if>><</nobr>>
</div><<set $happy5 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/yay.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Aw thanks so much, I couldn't have done it without you! You're the best therapist ever!!
[[No problem->main]]
</div><<audio ":music" pause>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: <<timed 0.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 1.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 2.5s>>.<</timed>><<timed 4s>><<goto "oh no">><</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Why thanks for asking! I'm miserable.
<<link "Who hurt you">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I don't know. I guess I'm having what's called an 'exponential crisps'
[[You mean an existential crisis]]
<</replace>><</link>></div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Lately, life has been feeling like a bowl of <<link "mashed potatoes">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: And I would put some seasoning and stuff on top to make it taste better, and for a short while it does, but then I'm back to tasting the bland, so I put more seasoning on top. It's just an endless cycle of eating mashed potatoes and a terrible seasoning addiction.
[[What]]
<</replace>><</link>>. I used to like eating mashed potatoes, but now it's getting so bland that eating it is making me feel sick and crappy.
</div><div id="cont"><img id="graphics" class="anim" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif"></div>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: See, that seasoning is like my thirst for evil. It makes me feel good, but only for a little moment, so I have to keep doing evil over and over just to run away from what I'm really feeling on the <<link "inside">><<replace "#txt">><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: But what's the point? Why should I continue to live like this? Why should I continue to live at all? I mean, I'm literally just a drawing, aren't I? I can't even get the privilege of death like you and everybody else. Everything I'm saying right now is just words typed by someone behind a computer screen. Am I even considered alive?
[[Um]]<</replace>><</link>>.
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Do I exist simply for the sake of entertaining you, the player? The lazy little <<if $mode>>moron<<else>>bitch<</if>> who decided to waste their time playing this stupid text game because they had nothing better to do? Is this my sole purpose? I don't want to be this way. I don't want to be controlled by a [[game maker]] for the enjoyment of people I don't care about.
</div><<set $cute5 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Alas, I have no choice but to comply. I was made for this, after all, and the game maker is my God. //They// are the ones that are writing everything I say, I'm just another vessel they need for their words.
[[...ok...->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: You foolish human. You think you can escape with such pathetic slander? You think I will change my mind and be a 'good boy' like you want me to?
[[...y-yeah?]]
</div><<set $angry5 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/bad.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I suggest you leave immediately, then. Hiding behind your computer screen will not stop me. I //will// come for you, <<if $mode>>player<<else>>bitch<</if>>.
[[*Start sweating*->main]]
</div>
<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/balls.png">
\<<audio "b-ohmy" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Great balls of fire! You want to attend our very first show?
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: The first and initial show, in fact?
[[Totes, my dudes]]
</div><<set $cute1 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/bones/balls.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Oh my! We must start the preparations immediately! An honorable guest such as yourself deserves only the bestest of jokes!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: We shall start writing jokes now!
[[Fabulous, darlings->main]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/no.png">
\<<audio "d-scream3" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: ExCUSE MEEE?! I'm the only one who's allowed to bully people, you have no right to roast me like that! My hair is made of fire, so I literally can't be roasted! You better get on your knees and beg for your life before this pissed off Queen beats the <<if $mode>>crap<<else>>shit<</if>> out of you!
[[Please forgive me, Fortissimi-san]]
[[I'm not apologizing to a crappy queen->baddie]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fort.png">
\<<audio "d-better1" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: That's better. I'll let it slide, but don't expect kindness from me next time.
[[Now tell me about yourself->Tell me about yourself]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/help.png">
\<<audio "e-what2" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: What? <<timed 1s>>That was a joke, right? <</timed>><<timed 2.5s>>Please tell me you were joking and you don't actually hate my dog.<</timed>>
<<timed 3.5s>>[[I was joking, dogs are too cute to be hated]]
[[Your dog is my arch-nemesis]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/ya.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh! <<timed 1s>>I see. <</timed>><<timed 2.5s>>I almost had a heart attack when you insulted my precious Honey like that. <</timed>><<timed 4s>>Now what was I talking about again?<</timed>>
<<timed 5s>>[[Your former luchador life->lucha]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/why.png">
\<<audio "e-how" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: But why? Why would you hate Honey when you've never even met her? She's like a tiny, golden, fluffy angel!
[[Because you're a villain, and I don't like villainy dogs]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/lucha/think.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: peru">Esteban</span>: Oh. <<timed 1.5s>>Is that what you really think of me? <</timed>><<timed 3s>>An evil, unredeemable villain?<</timed>>
<<timed 4.5s>>[[Obviously]]<</timed>>
</div><<nobr>>
<<audio ":music" stop>>
<div class="scene">
<video id="video" height="100%" autoplay>
<source src="scenes/good.mp4" type="video/mp4" />
Your browser does not support this HTML5 video tag. No cutscene for you!
<a data-passage="Menu">Main Menu</a>
</video>
</div>
<</nobr>>
\<<script>>
$(document).ready(function(){
$("#video").on("ended", function() {
Engine.play("Menu")
});
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<</script>>
<<nobr>>
<<audio ":music" stop>>
<div class="scene">
<video id="video" height="100%" autoplay>
<source src="scenes/bad.mp4" type="video/mp4" />
Your browser does not support this HTML5 video tag. No cutscene for you!
<a data-passage="Menu">Main Menu</a>
</video>
</div>
<</nobr>>
\<<script>>
$(document).ready(function(){
$("#video").on("ended", function() {
Engine.play("Menu")
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<</script>>
<<nobr>><div id="arrow-left"><a onclick="plusDivs(-1)"><img src="img2/left.png" width="70px" height="70px" style="position: absolute;top: 43%;left: 20%;transform: translate(0%,-50%);display: inline;position: absolute;vertical-align: middle;padding: 215px 0;user-select: none;"></a></div>
<div id="arrow-right"><a onclick="plusDivs(+1)"><img src="img2/right.png" width="70px" height="70px" style="display: inline-block;vertical-align: middle;text-align: center;white-space: nowrap;overflow: hidden;position: absolute;top: 43%;right: 20%;transform: translate(0%,-50%);"></a></div><</nobr>>
<<if $cute1>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/tick.png">
<div class="desc">A ticket to a comedy show featuring an iconic duo. Hopefully you can make it!</div></div>
\<<else>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/null.png">
<div class="desc">???</div></div><</if>>
\<<if $cute2>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/sweater.png">
<div class="desc">A knitted pink sweater, made with love and wholesomeness :')</div></div>
\<<else>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/null.png">
<div class="desc">???</div><</if>>
\<<if $cute3>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/neck.png">
<div class="desc">A BFF necklace with black rock lavas. Currently radiates high levels of tsundere enegry.</div></div>
\<<else>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/null.png">
<div class="desc">???</div></div><</if>>
\<<if $cute4>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/book.png">
<div class="desc">A family album of two luchadores and a sweet, sweet puppy. Epic lucha stories included.</div></div>
\<<else>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/null.png">
<div class="desc">???</div></div><</if>>
\<<if $cute5>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/gurl.png">
<div class="desc">A girl with her head lost in the clouds. A confusing art piece from Spudz but perhaps it means something to him.</div></div>
\<<else>><div class="item"><img style="" class="ex" src="img2/null.png">
<div class="desc">???</div></div><</if>>
@@.bitch;[[Menu]]@@
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</script><</nobr>><<if State.passage isnot Story.get("Menu").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("Settings").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("Credits").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("Extras").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("test passage").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("good end").title && State.passage isnot Story.get("bad end").title>><div id="icon"><a data-passage="Settings" class="link-internal link-image"><img id="settings" src="img2/setting.png"></a></div><</if>>
\<<nobr>><<if $mute>>
<<audio ":music" stop>>
<<audio ":music" mute>>
<<else>>
<<audio ":music" unmute>>
<</if>>
<</nobr>><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: The developer of this game is not very proficient in digital art, so you will have to excuse them.
[[Why are you so jiggly?]]
[[What does that art thing you gave me mean?->art]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: That's just how I am, you don't need to be rude about my body.
[[Why are you so fat?]]
[[Can explain that picture in the Extras section?->art]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/norm.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: Oh, I can't draw. I'm a dog!
[[I'm asking you, Dev]]
</div><<set $angry5 to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/meanie.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: You know what, you're fat times infinity! If you're just gonna sit here and hurt my feelings then I don't wanna talk to you anymore!
[[Fine!->main]]
</div><<audio ":music" pause>>\
<<audio "sad" volume 0 fadein>>\
<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: <<timed 1s>>Oh.<</timed>><<timed 2s>> Um.<</timed>><<timed 3s>> I don't know. It's just a little something I thought to add to all my games. You know, like an easter [[egg]].<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: I mean, it does mean something to me, but you can figure it out yourself once it makes more appearances in the [[future]].
</div><<set $done to true>>
\<img id="graphics" src="images/spudz/unhappy.gif">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: salmon">Spudz</span>: <<timed 1s>>You will understand it then...<</timed>><<timed 3s>>won't you?<</timed>>
<<timed 5s>>[[Uh...->main]]<</timed>>
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/uh.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Oh please, I've got plenty more outfits that will make your jaw drop. Glamour is my middle name! I just don't think you deserve to see them yet, that's why I went with a party-casual dress for today.
[[When will I be worthy of your glory?]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/fyi.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: I can Snap you pics of them, but I only do that with friends.
[[Is that all you're gonna send me?]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/queen/tea.png">
\<<audio "d-yah3" play>>
<div id="txt"><span style="color: darkred">Fortissimi</span>: Well, what else could you ask for?
@@font-family:arial;font-size:18px;[[( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)->main]]@@
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/smart.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: As you can see, our clothes have been torn as a result of numerous battles. Naturally, our pantaloons could not stand a chance and thus we had to stop wearing them.
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: Too many holes, you see.
[[Why not ditch the shirts then, too?]]
</div><img id="graphics" src="images/bones/wait.png">
<div id="txt"><span style="color: gray">Boneson</span>: Don't be ridiculous! We have some decency, you know!
<span style="color: dimgray">Bonetson</span>: We mustn't show such private parts.
[[Of course!->main]]
</div><<nobr>>
<div class="scene">
<video id="video" height="100%" autoplay>
<source src="scenes/bad.mp4" type="video/mp4" />
Your browser does not support this HTML5 video tag. No cutscene for you!
<a data-passage="Menu">Main Menu</a>
</video>
</div>
<</nobr>>
\<<script>>
$(document).ready(function(){
$("#video").on("ended", function() {
Engine.play("Menu")
});
});
<</script>>